Ep 69 – Stop doing this when you meditate!

If someone were to measure, I presume meditation has the highest drop out rate. All of us know meditation helps but many of us try and feel we are not cut out to meditate and stop after a few attempts. It’s not because of the lack of intent or effort but the lack of understanding about what meditation truly is. With so many myths around meditation, a lot of us who need it most shy away from the practice. If that’s you too, then this one is for you.

Hello and welcome back to the own your everyday series of he Being Meraklis podcast. I’m your host and self-awareness coach Shwetha Sivaraman back with some weekly insights and perspectives to help you own your every day!

If you’d asked me about meditation a few years ago, I’d have laughed and said why bother? But 3 years of meditating almost every single day has changed my entire world view. Born and raised in a family that has had exposure to Yoga and Meditation for many years, I feel like a fool today for not tapping into the power of meditation earlier. But hey, better late than never. And if you’ve been on and off with meditation too, I hope this episode serves as your wake up call to get back and stay on!

What is meditation really?

Think about it – what image comes to your mind when I say the word meditation – a monk or saint sitting oh so serious with an intense concentration and pressure between the eyebrows? Or maybe something even more intense. A lot of us wrongly assume meditation to be an act of concentration. And so when we sit down to meditate we try and concentrate – don’t think anything else, don’t think anything else, concentrate you fool! Don’t think about anything else. And what happens within a few seconds – we are thinking about everything else – from David’s sarcasm in the latest Schitts Creek episode to the horrible email your boss sent to what you’re having for lunch today and how its still raining in Bombay your mind tries to remember everything and anything.

Eventually when this happens enough number of times, we give up. We say meditation is not for me. It doesn’t work for me. I cannot concentrate. And in that lies the biggest myth about meditation.

You don’t have to concentrate to meditate, you simply have to pay attention. When we concentrate we exclude, think about it, when you keep saying concentrate on your breath concentrate on your breath you’re excluding everything but you’re breathing. But we don’t work like that, our nature is all inclusive and so is the path to meditation. When you pay attention, you include everything – a thought comes up you acknowledge it’s presence, an itch comes up you acknowledge it’s presence, a scent comes up and reminds you of summer tales in Europe, you acknowledge it’s presence. You don’t force something to come up, You don’t resist anything that comes up.

You simply pay attention. The one thing you need to stop doing to meditate effortlessly is Stop trying to stop thinking.

It is a futile effort. When meditating if you’re continuously telling yourself “Stop Thinking” that itself is another thought and you’re going down a vicious spiral.

Like Osho says, “The very effort to stop will create more anxiety, it will create conflict, it will make you split. You will be constant turmoil, within. This is not going to help.”

What you need to do is let go, instead of riding the wave with every thought, simple sit by the shore and watch. Dont be the fool trying to stop waves.

Allow it go back the same way it cropped up. No need to do any action. Give the thoughts complete freedom, let them churn as fast or as slow as they want. By being a mere witness you’ll stop fuelling these thoughts and they’ll eventually slow down.

“Whatever you fight, you strengthen, and what you resist, persists.” ~ Eckhart Tolle So don’t fight the thoughts, instead let them pass, gradually they will trickle down to a few weak voices far apart and there will be space that emerges between the thoughts. In that quiet you find what you’re looking for in meditation.

You don’t have to do anything, just be a witness to all that’s happening within. And this continued attention will improve your concentration eventually. Concentration is an outcome of meditation not an input.

So here’s your own your everyday tip this week – meditation is for everyone seeking peace and quiet within and do not believe the myth that you have to stop thinking to be successful at meditation. Keep paying attention and keep practicing, meditation works in a myriad tangible and intangible ways and you’ll be able to see the difference soon enough. If you’re looking for more ways to be engaged in life and lead peaceful, balanced, and successful lives read my latest e-book on the 11 fundamental truths to living a good life. The e-book is a synthesis of many of my learnings to date with a practical approach on how to implement and integrate in our daily lives. Download for free from the links across our socials and if you find value – contribute any sum you feel is right to help me fund this labor of love I pursue at the Being Meraklis. I invest several hours and rupees to make this content valuable and useful to the audience and any support will take us a long way.

Until we meet again, this is Shwetha signing off hoping you have a fabulous week ahead.